Decisions made before we get there are tough to swallow.
That’s why all kids burn their fingers on the stove. They weren’t there when it was decided it was too hot to touch, even though the information was relayed to them sincerely.
Telling somebody, “We decided giving you Y would be better than giving you X” is pointless because we didn’t give them a chance to consider the alternative.
Something isn’t better than nothing if you didn’t realize you were getting nothing to begin with.
And what might seem like the best of both worlds could turn out to be the worst of both for the person who wasn’t involved in the conversation.
It’s safer not to assume otherwise.
Is this working for you?
If it is, keep doing it.
If not, maybe it’s time to change it up.
It’s either change it up or put up and shut up, right?
And nobody should have to do that.
Least of all you.
When someone is letting you down they’ll often say something like, “This is the hardest decision I’ve ever made.”
It sounds nice. And it’s nice that they bother to say it. But it doesn’t do much to soften the blow and does nothing to change the fact they’re rejecting you.
What they’re really saying is, “I know this is going to hurt you, which is probably going to hurt me too but I’m doing it anyway.”
And when you put it like that, the first way does sound a lot nicer.
They often mean that it was an easy decision not to…
The easier decision to stay. The easier decision not to say no. The easier decision to stay in their comfort zone.
The shit thing about life is that the hardest decision is usually the right one.
Easy road, hard life. Hard road, easy life.
As they say.