Not many people want to hear this:
If you’re insulted by something, it’s your fault.
This is my favourite of Don Miguel Ruiz’s Four Agreements because it’s so hard to agree with, and to put into practice fully.
How can it be our fault if we get insulted by someone who is screaming at us or calling us names?
The idea is that we always have a choice; we are the ones who allow words to carry weight, whether we’re conscious of it or not. And of course, often what people are angry about has very little to do with us or what just happened.
It’s one thing to know that it’s not our fault when someone is angry at us. But it’s far harder to remember that when we’re mad at someone else, that’s on us.
Much easier said than done!